tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-33218373.post4054769836667156741..comments2023-09-01T09:05:27.990-05:00Comments on The Moon Topples: GBA(s)FC (Growth) Entry #17The Moon Toppleshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12717446064777879248noreply@blogger.comBlogger9125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-33218373.post-76670167333615301762007-05-16T21:31:00.000-05:002007-05-16T21:31:00.000-05:00Thanks everyone for all of your positive and encou...Thanks everyone for all of your positive and encouraging comments!<BR/><BR/>Beth,<BR/>I'm a sucker for a father/son story, too. My wife laughs at me whenever "Field of Dreams" is on TV. The scene where the Kevin Costner-character's father asks if he wants to "have a catch" opens the floodgates every time. I get teary-eyed just thinking about it... <BR/><BR/>HinSF,<BR/>Thank you.<BR/>It's hard (in 500 words) to convey, but yeah, that's essentially what I was trying to show, and that his "redemption" comes from within, from his own self-awareness.<BR/><BR/>Verillion,<BR/>Although I think that you (and others) credit me with a bit too much technical know-how (thanks, though!), the formatting was intentional. In the "paragraphs" there was no *real* dialogue (until perhaps the last one, where the character talks to himself). Change happens when people start talking...<BR/><BR/>Canterbury,<BR/>Thanks for your kind words.<BR/><BR/>Jason,<BR/>Yes, that's what I was trying to express, and that (as I mentioned to HinSF) it has to come from within. Thanks! <BR/><BR/>Caroline,<BR/>Thanks, your kind words have touched me!<BR/><BR/>Brilliant Donkey,<BR/>Thanks for your comments! As I mentioned to Verillion, the formatting was very intentional, and it's easy for me to understand why you preferred the "dialogue". <BR/><BR/>To the kind Jury,<BR/>Thank you, indeed!Rickhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02630742048605089548noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-33218373.post-42018710518964086282007-05-16T08:21:00.000-05:002007-05-16T08:21:00.000-05:00The Jury says..."Each paragraph is like a verse th...The Jury says...<BR/><BR/>"Each paragraph is like a verse that is locking the main character into a set of expectations. Finally when the Joe character chooses to be different, the form of the piece reverts to prose. I really like the way the form of the story also helps to move the narrative."The Moon Toppleshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12717446064777879248noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-33218373.post-74155793320872208922007-05-14T20:52:00.000-05:002007-05-14T20:52:00.000-05:00I liked the snapshots in time. Very well done. I a...I liked the snapshots in time. Very well done. I also like the "we can become our parents but don't HAVE to" message I got from it. I DID very much prefer your dialogue format near the end when he was talking to his son compared with the earlier formats in the first few paragraphs.<BR/><BR/>BDbriliantdonkeyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05159881776835603748noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-33218373.post-69067380390252077022007-05-13T07:03:00.000-05:002007-05-13T07:03:00.000-05:00This one touched me.xThis one touched me.<BR/>xCarolinehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04470638074202676460noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-33218373.post-28484437370194949792007-05-12T10:37:00.000-05:002007-05-12T10:37:00.000-05:00A great exploration of breaking the chain. I enjo...A great exploration of breaking the chain. I enjoyed this.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-33218373.post-76907269772914999552007-05-10T08:46:00.000-05:002007-05-10T08:46:00.000-05:00heart-warming. nice one.heart-warming. nice one.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-33218373.post-25619018486825940182007-05-08T04:54:00.000-05:002007-05-08T04:54:00.000-05:00I like the way that the paragraphs were set out al...I like the way that the paragraphs were set out almost like verses and then when Joe changes you revert to prose. Cute story.Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08533913253403252799noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-33218373.post-50770438389422989582007-05-07T23:56:00.000-05:002007-05-07T23:56:00.000-05:00This one made me smile. There was suspense after ...This one made me smile. <BR/><BR/>There was suspense after the suspended sentence, wondering if the next time we saw Joey, he would be on death row.<BR/><BR/>But he redeemed himself and his own father, maybe all his ancestors, when his love for his son taught him that being a man is about gentleness and approval.<BR/><BR/>Well done.heartinsanfranciscohttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07535397382991383931noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-33218373.post-40812216838063992662007-05-07T12:12:00.000-05:002007-05-07T12:12:00.000-05:00I'm a sucker for father/son stories. I really enj...I'm a sucker for father/son stories. I really enjoyed this.Bethhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17335415338155220244noreply@blogger.com