Sunday, May 06, 2007

GBA(s)FC (Growth) Entry #14

Seeds of Truth
by Sognatrice

Anna cupped her growing belly as she leaned over the sink and stuck two fingers into the soil of the basil plant on the windowsill.

Still not time to water.

How many basil plants had she killed in her overanxious desire to see them big, leafy, and oh so healthy?

Not this time, she swore.

So instead of filling up the watering can, she peered out the open window past the basil and saw a bumblebee buzzing around her orchids. She used to be afraid of anything with stingers, but after much trial and error, she learned that if she let bumblebees do their thing, they wouldn't even notice her. Her only job was to cultivate the orchid seeds and keep them alive for when a bumblebee's turn would finally arrive.

"Unbelievable! Another car bomb," yelled her husband from the next room.

She heard the unmistakable pop of the recliner being unreclined, but her eyes remained fixed on the furry black and yellow visitor.

Although she considered digging out her camera to capture the moment, she didn't want to lose a single second of the golden sunlight catching the white of her orchids, which made her squint, and, accordingly, smile. And besides, just because she had accepted coexistence with Bernie, as she called the bumbler, it didn't mean she trusted him.

So she shifted her weight onto her right foot, crossed her arms, and titled her head for a better angle.

"How we can continue to stay there when it's obvious that they're going to have to build their own country with their own rules?" asked her husband, tapping the remote control on his leg in time with Bernie's fluttering wings. "Honey, come here and see this," he said.

"Why don't you come here and watch this instead?" she said without turning towards him.

After one last look at debris, he turned off the television, threw the remote on the couch, and joined his wife at the window, standing just behind her.

Over her shoulder, he watched the bumblebee kissing the orchid's waiting, yellow lips.

"You know that the laws of aerodynamics say that a bumblebee can't fly?" he whispered into his wife's ear, careful not to disturb the romantic moment before him.

"Obviously no one told the bumblebee," she whispered back, and they laughed.

As the bumblebee moved on, she noticed some weeds had shot up in the cement cracks of the walkway. She didn't remember seeing even a hint of them yesterday.

"I'll get those tomorrow," her husband said, following her gaze. And then the tiny sprouts of basil on the windowsill caught his eye.

Perfect, he thought, envisioning a rich pesto in their future, and hugged his wife, wrapping his arms around his world.


Beth said...

Extremely well done. I'm a gardener and bee enthusiast, so truly enjoyed this.

Wisewebwoman said...

Romantic and lovely. Thank you.

Pallav said...

The scenery is great.I have questions but I guess i'll rest them till the authors are allowed to reveal themselves ;)



Joni said...

Very romantic feeling. Bright and warm. Almost makes me forget how much I hate bees.

This is a stunning piece.

Beth said...

Just wanted the author to know, this secured one of my votes. Good job.

Anonymous said...

Very sweet vision. A glowing moment-in-life vignette.

Anonymous said...

Lovely story. Loved the use of words, the playfulness, the contrast of her situation and the husbands. Was a little perplexed at the tone of the last paragraph, but loved the garden, the bumblebee, the stillness of her standing, watching.

Really great stuff.

briliantdonkey said...

Very beautiful,romantic, story which can't help but call up some warm and fuzzies.

"How we can continue to stay there ......"

You may want to change that to "How can we....".

Other than that, very nicely done. So far, one of my favorites.


briliantdonkey said...

Glad to see this one got some recognition. As I said before it was among my favorites. Congrats on a job very well done.


Michelle | Bleeding Espresso said...

Thank you for all who commented and voted; this was my first contest, and it was a lot of fun to write and read the other entries.

Brilliantdonkey, you're absolutely correct on the wording--bad proofreading!

Goodthomas, tell me more about how you feel about the tone....

Nothingman, I hope your questions aren't too difficult ;)

Anonymous said...

Congratulations!! As I said earlier, I really enjoyed the experience of reading this.

The Moon Topples said...

The Jury says...

"Some beautiful writing is a joyous read, some fun words (“unreclined,” “bumbler”) used, an interesting snapshot of two people apart and together."

"This one stood out. A simple, subtle study of gentle growth. Beautifully written with good descriptive pieces. Crisp and thoughtful with no wastage. Good structure that guided the whole piece through very vivid, simple imagery.Excellent and effective change of view in the last sentence. My winner. This is a good writer."

all over the map said...

Enjoyed this thoroughly. Any chance of the story being inspired by glances from a medieval apartment somewhere in Calabria?
I always enjoy the way you work your words together.