Thursday, May 24, 2007

The Moon Topples needs weird life advice from strangers

My friend Goodthomas is needy.

Trouble is, he doesn't always know what he needs. So he created a Google search combining his name and the word "needs." His results are here.

I decided to replicate his search to see if I could get some free advice from Google about my life. Since my first name only results in misspellings of "math" and results in other languages, I used my last name, and substituted my blog name in the results below.

The Moon Topples needs help with everything...

The Moon Topples needs to be in Houston...

But The Moon Topples needs to keep Griffin naked...

The Moon Topples needs to be better known among the American public...

I think that The Moon Topples needs to have the same attitude, just be aggressive...

The Moon Topples needs fresh examination...

The Moon Topples needs more space...

The Moon Topples needs to learn to value and love himself more and to express his appreciation for others more openly...

The Moon Topples needs 18 wins to move into the top 50 all-time...

The Moon Topples needs to be broadcast throughout the country (and world for that matter!) so he can start winning the Grammy's...

The Moon Topples needs to show a lack of specific similarities to support his case...

The Moon Topples needs to stop blaming the messenger just so he can enable himself to cling to propositions divorced from observed reality...

The Moon Topples needs to be carefully monitored by the owners to avoid drawing the naturally contaminated ground water away from the uranium production area...

The Moon Topples needs to meet some new friends...

The Moon Topples needs to be verified to be microbiologically safe...

The Moon Topples needs more revenue...

The Moon Topples needs to watch that...

The Moon Topples needs to get over it...

The Moon Topples needs to step up tomorrow. That's all there is to it...

The Moon Topples needs the spotlight the way some of us need food and air...


Thanks GT and Google, for teaming up to help me better understand my life. Now if only there was a way to figure out what I want. Oh, right. That's what Amazon is for.

This isn't a meme, but it should be. If anyone else decides to give this a try, please let me know.

16 comments:

Atyllah said...

The Moon Topples is very needy... part of the human condition... but perhaps the Moon Topples needs help...? Thinks: nice long couch, man in dark suit...
Hope, after wanting on Amazon, Moon Topples doesn't need to rob a bank!
:-)

Stray said...

http://dailystraying.blogspot.com/2007/05/what-i-need.html

I have memed it and tagged some peeps :)

Oh Maht, I think it's good to acknowledge your needs. I will be analysing mine later today :)

(ps - google tells me it was a meme back in 2005).

Caroline said...

:)

so happy that I can visit here again without that scary fly thing!!!!!!!! I can still see it from the corner of my eye.

*shudder*

xx

caveblogem said...

This is a cool meme. I wasn't part of the blog-o-sphere in 2005, so I missed it.

I was curious, so I searched for "Maht needs." Three entries:
maht needs mah glassis
maht needs a wrist brace
maht needs johanna von koczian and johnna von kocziam is elisabeth von thueringen

I also have a distinctive first name, so I'm going to get weird results when I do this (maybe today, if I have time, maybe early next week.) But I checked it out and have a lot of needs, weird though they are.

sognatrice said...

I really, really hope you're verified as microbiologically safe soon. It's a bummer on the other side of that fence.

Thanks for visiting mine :)

goodthomas said...

Yeah, Mr. Mack Tackles, but who the hell is Elisabeth Von Thueringen?

Oh my, funny stuff, sir.

heartinsanfrancisco said...

I hope the spotlight works out for you instead of food and air. Think of the revenue you'll reap.

Every time I read your blog, the snapshot thingie goes off. Do you have pictures of me in the early morning, rubbing my eyes while trying to connect mouth and coffee mug?

You know I'm camera-shy.

Anna MR said...

Hello Mr MahtMoon, you stranger you. I am not going to do this on the bloggy, not now anyway (have done a fair few tags recently etc), but was surprised to find how many of mine came up sex-related.

Don't know what to make of that.

Wanderlust Scarlett said...

Ahh moon, now that you know what you need, how on earth will you get it all?
I posted a link to 10 of my needs on Sognatrice's page.

I think you'll be fine, as long as the IRS doesn't get involved in your needs.

Scarlett

Ms Melancholy said...

I'm off to do it....

The Moon Topples said...

Atyllah: Nice to see you again. I am pondering your advice and staying away from banks.

Stray: Makes sense it was a meme. But in my defense, I still thought blogging was a ridiculous thing in 2005.

Caroline: Are you forgetting that grotesque monster of a spider you left up for like three days? I still have bad dreams...

Cavey: How sweet of you to do a search for my name. I'm inordinately fond of the last one. Now off to read your results...

Sognatrice: Apparently I was supposed to bribe the inspector. I had no clue. I'll do better when I next get tested.

GT: Perhaps she is the future Mrs Moon Topples?

HinSF: I honestly am not sure what you are talking about. Snapshot thingy? At any rate, I cannot see you when you stop by. Don't fret.

Anna: Google sees all and knows all. You must trust the advice it gives.

Wanderlust: Well, I suppose you've just underlined one of the essential problems of the human condition. I shall attempt to find a Google search to remedy this as well...

Ms. M: I look forward to your results...

Liz said...

That's very funny. I just tried it with my last name and the results are really funny. I'm going to post it sometime next week.

Canterbury Soul said...

did mine. go take a look. really fun, yeah?

Mellifluous Dark said...

I tried this. It was somewhat spooky.

Hello, BTW. I have blogrolled you (did it a while back) as, well, I like your use of words.

The Moon Topples said...

Liz: I think it's the perfect meme, since it's so effortless and entertaining. I am quite glad GT revived it. Can't wait to see yours.

Canter: Saw yours, very nicely done...

Mel: Off to read you right now...

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